Autumnal Attitude

“No spring nor summer beauty hath such grace as I have seen in one autumnal face.”
― John Donne

Change isn’t always better.

Change can be scary, or damaging, or wrong.

But change is the natural order from whence forces conduct so a fresh line of hope can be drawn.

The beginning of this school year was distressing for me. Abraham and I have been inseparable for the past 18-26 months. Dropping him off each day is like sending him off to kindergarten all over again. Only this time he’s emerging in his third grade element, and I’m stuck, waiting for the other shoe to drop.

But as the days pass, I am wearing a positive groove into our routine, and my attitude is slowly improving. After all, I couldn’t ask for a more supportive group for our son than the staff and students of Taft Primary School.

For instance, the homecoming parade was across the field from the school. Abraham was able to walk there, but having the energy to return was a completely different story.

So the new principal, Mr. Lee, gave Abe a piggyback ride most of the way back to school. The kids thought it was great fun, and once again, a school situation that could’ve been beyond Abraham’s ability was not only possible but downright warmhearted and enjoyable. I must learn to rely on others now, and give myself some space to rebuild.

A friend told me that I needed to be as good in giving myself grace as I am in sharing it with others. I thought about that quite a bit over the weekend. I’m not sure where to start with myself, so I will do what always feels best; I will look to nature to find direction and peace.

Autumnal attitude comes as a second spring of color where even though the chill of winter is nearing, we warm to the idea of fall. I remain absorbed in the well being of my family, but I don’t want worry to mute the bright colors emerging from our recovery.

So, I’m going to take the advice from my dear friend as well as from Mother Nature and practice grace and depth born of natural change. With enough practice, I hope to find peace along the changing landscape.